Vacation, vacation, vacation

I don't know about you, but I love vacations. They are so relaxing and with the right one, you don't have to cook or clean! I went with my mother, sister, cousin, and bro-in law on a cruise to Bermuda. It was so much fun!
And yet, I get so intimidated around them. For one thing, it's back to talking over everyone and being judgmental. No lie-- we walked out of a restaurant on a ship because my sister was having a conniption over a little boy drinking coffee. Now, I'm not saying that's right... I mean who thinks that giving an 8 year old coffee is a great idea? But on the flip side, we give them soda and tea with caffeine. Culturally, other countries are no different. Also, the kid was on vacation! Everyone knows that a vacation is a time where we all eat like we don't normally do so, and drink things that we normally don't drink, and never sleep. There were kids everywhere who stayed up all hours of the night because they were on VACATION. And yet, my family-- as much as I love them talked and judged the whole time. But, that's my family. It's what they do and it puts me in such a foul mood sometimes. It was nice to get away, but I didn't want to hear about them judging others over and over again over their vacation life. I finally stood up for some of the parents pointing out that on vacation, the rules are different. It may not be how we raise our kids, but that's the point. They sort of cooled down a little after that, but not by much.
Also, all of them think that they know more than I do which is absolutely annoying. I know I'm no Einstein, but give me a little credit. My bro-in-law actually told me to my face that he's smarter (how humble, right) not knowing that this was one of the worse things he could have said to a person who's struggled her whole life. But this is how it is with my family. This didn't encompass the whole vacation and only accounted for about 10% of it, so don't get me wrong. I'm actually more mad at myself because during this whole thing, I lost sight of who I was and allowed myself to be pulled in. This type of behavior could have cost me my sobriety (although I didn't let it). We didn't talk about God except in cases of judging others and I did nothing to change the conversation except for that one time. The funny thing is that before I left there was a church bulletin that is a pretty popular bulletin for summer which says, "God doesn't take a vacation from you." I laughed until this week because now, I'm not in a good place because I forgot who I was. God doesn't take a vacation from me but I didn't quite take Him with me on vacation. I'm glad to be back home. While vacation is fun, so is being supported and surrounded by people who love me and want to lift me and others up. I'm very thankful for them and for their constant pushing me towards God. I'm excited about the presence of God in my life and am thankful for the chance to come back with new energy towards pursuing Him.